Why is today this hard? It’s a beautiful sunny day. My latte tastes just right – and I didn’t have to make it. My partners are both in good moods. It’s a payday. I slept well – hell, I slept in! Shit. This just isn’t ok… and I have trouble understanding why I can’t just … whatever… and have things settle into a calm serene glow. It’s a day off.  I got to spend a little money on something cool (a new yoga mat). There’s no pressure to do, or go. I am, however, undeniably irritable and feeling very much as if the sounds of other people existing is… too much. Angry little demons clawing at the insides of my sense of peace, begging for a few moments to storm and rage, like echoes of a fight that hasn’t happened yet.  Irksome.

It’s getting weird all around as things play out… the internet sucks. The banking industry seems affected inasmuch as authentication servers far and wide seem reluctant to do their bit toward authentication. Small frustrations. My partners picking up on my irritability a little at a time. The look on my face, the sound of my typing… I have other things to do. Better choices? It’s a poor time to write, perhaps, but today may not have unlimited time for writing, and I may not feel like it later. So, I’m off to do a few things, the best I can, and hoping not to damage the heart of the world by being who I am.