I slept okay. I woke up okay. The morning seems a relatively ordinary one. The weekend was generally good, although I feel like I didn’t get much done due to swapping out a notable portion of the time I would have spent on housework for self-care, and I still somehow manage to feel uncomfortable with that.

[No AI is used in writing or editing this blog. This is human content for human readers.]

I watched the moon setting as I watered the lawn.

It’s forecast to be hot today. I watered before I left for my walk. I ended up going back into the house for a warm cardigan. The forecast may say it’ll be a hot day, but it is quite chilly now. Funny how that sometimes happens.

It’s not important, just an observation on an ordinary Monday, for which I have no particular enthusiasm. That seems odd to me, but even that is pretty ordinary; people feeling some reluctance and lack of enthusiasm for the beginning of another work week is nothing new at all. We’ve probably all been there however much we may enjoy our work. I shrug to myself as I walk this familiar trail. There’s so much I’d rather be doing than working, but working is what pays the bills and unlocks the opportunities to do those other things, often. It’s unfortunate that we spend so much of our lives on this fucking hamster wheel.

Get off the hamster wheel now and then.

Yesterday’s hike was a lovely one. I enjoyed it enough to wonder if I could make it there and back on a workday… I’d be pushing my luck on the timing in a way likely to trigger my time hang-up, and cause me stress, undermining the value of the walk. Probably not a great idea. I’ll have to settle for weekends. This too, is ordinary. Most things are.

My allergies are vexing me, even this is nothing noteworthy. Human beings and spring allergies are a known thing. There’s an entire industry involved in dealing with allergies, and and whole field of medicine devoted to treating them. Mine are not bad relative to how bad they can be. I can enjoy flowers and walks among the trees, and petting cats… but there are a couple things that trigger my allergies, and they cluster in springtime. Tree pollen, mostly. Something about specific foods causes me to break out in sneezing and immediate sinus congestion and a runny nose. Wool against my bare skin can make me break out in hives. Bee stings are the most serious. Bee stings can cause anaphylaxis for me, and this time of year I carry a bee sting kit everywhere.

I’m grateful that I can enjoy the scents of flowers.

I sigh to myself at the halfway point on my rather ordinary walk on this ordinary Spring Monday. I’m not complaining. I’m grateful. Ordinary is okay, and for most values of ordinary, this is pretty good. My lack of enthusiasm isn’t nearly as important as this beautiful morning. I enjoy it for what it is. I enjoy it as I am. It’s enough.

Sunshine and oak trees, and a path; the way ahead is obvious, if not exciting.

I’m just saying, I suppose, that there’s no reason to expect that a healing journey or a journey to become the person you most want to be will lead to an exciting, eventful life of adventure and wild delight. Sometimes – mostly, perhaps – the big win is the relative lack of excitement, and the increase in ordinary pleasures.

Yesterday in the evening, things went sideways for a short time. My Traveling Partner and I stepped all over each other’s trauma and baggage. While that was thoroughly unpleasant, I’m impressed by our ability to recover from it, bounce back, and enjoy the remainder of the evening together. He impresses me. I’m grateful for the work he puts into a relationship. I smile and swing my feet from this bench, kind of wishing I’d worn the new sweater he gave me yesterday (an early birthday gift). I feel very loved. Not just because of the sweater.

What will you find if you slow down to see more?

I breathe, exhale, and relax. Sure, it’s an ordinary Monday, and I’d rather spend it with my beloved than spend the day working. That’s real, and it’s nothing special or extraordinary, just very human. I’m okay with it. I sigh and look at the time. I’ve a few more minutes before I have to begin again. I’ll make a point to enjoy them.

Feeling stuck? It happens. Been there… not lately, but once upon a time it was pretty common, even chronic. I’m sitting at a different trailhead this morning. Almost wilderness, but not really. It’s simply unfamiliar, and the novelty feels wilder and more remote than this little green space really is.

A well trodden trail leading to an unknown destination.

[No AI is used in writing or editing this blog. This is human content for human readers.]

I passed through the gate, which just stands there not attached to anything, preventing vehicular traffic passing through, into the big clover meadow encircled by trees, bounded on one side by the silent broad Willamette River, and on the other a forest that extends to a quiet rural state highway. This early on a chilly Sunday morning there is no traffic, nor are there other visitors.

Care for a swim? 😆

Available data suggests that the river is relatively shallow here, between 7″ and 10″ deep, but it’s deceptively calm surface manages to suggest caution, and anyway it’s much too cold for swimming, at 41F (7C) this morning (air temperature that is, I expect the water is maybe a bit warmer, based on the mist hanging above the river, but it wouldn’t be enough to coax the average person into it).

A meadow of clover, a moment of joy.

I start down the trail. Even this hard-packed dirt trail is much easier on my ankle and my foot than pavement ever is. I still have my cane, but my stride feels easy and natural. It’s a nice change and I ask myself why I don’t come here more often? It’s a lovely spot, and only 17 miles from home. The view of the sunrise over the river is quite splendid. I sigh contentedly as I walk. The air smells of Spring flowers, clover, blackberries, wild cucumber, and spicy scents of various wildflowers less familiar to me. In rainier seasons most of this trail is too muddy to walk safely. I enjoy being able to reach the far side of the meadow and circle back around.

Wild cucumber blooming among the thimbleberries.

I get some great pictures as I make the loop around the meadow. There’s something vaguely nostalgic about the scent here. Something that hints at childhood visits to my grandparents’ house in summertime, or weekends working in the garden. I breathe, exhale, and relax, pausing now and then to soak in the scene and the scent.

I find a spot to stop a moment, to write and watch the river flow past. It is so quiet here, it’s hard to imagine I am close to a city at all, but Salem is only 7 miles away. Doesn’t matter at all how close it is in miles. Measured by the experience of this moment, it may as well not exist at all.

Watching the sun rise from a new vantage point.

… I’ll definitely be coming back to this trail more often…

I sit quietly enjoying my time in this place.  The light through the trees changes as the sun continues to climb higher in the sky. I reflect on conversations with my beloved Traveling Partner over recent days. He’s been helping me quite a lot with putting more explicit focus on my self-care and it has been making a difference.

Bunnies!

Motion catches my eye; a rabbit with baby bunnies has ventured out into the grass near the trail. She’s far enough from this rock I’m sitting on to be fearless about my presence. I watch the bunnies hop into the open space of the trail, then dart away, when a shadow passes overhead, returning to continue munching and playing. I watch them for a long while, contemplating consciousness and intelligence, and the arrogance of human primates and our delusions of our special place in the world. We know so little of everything there is to know, and even less about the vastness of what we don’t even know we don’t know. Are bunnies self-aware? Do they reason? Do they feel and experience emotions? (Why would we think they don’t, other than to make ourselves feel better when we kill them?)

As I watch, one rabbit with bunnies becomes several, all hopping and playing at the edge of the meadow in the sunshine of a new day. Some of the bunnies roll in the dust of the dry packed trail. A variety of songbirds flit about. I feel fortunate and delighted to see all of this. I fill up on the feeling of wonder and joy.

I sit with my thoughts awhile, then walk a trail that heads the other direction from the trailhead. There’s more to see. The morning is mine to enjoy as I will. I think happily to my Traveling Partner encouraging me to make something of the day for myself. “Do something for you,” he said. This is me, doing that. I breathe the scented Spring air deeply and walk on. It’s a lovely moment for it.

Strange fruit. What might you see if you slow down and really look?

There’s nothing in the news more worth my attention than these quiet moments in the real world. There is no app on any device that offers me more than I’ll find on this trail, in this moment, here, now. Look up from your scrolling long enough to see that there is a real reality in which you exist, with much to see and do and choose from. Your choices matter. There’s a reason all these apps want your attention, and more and more businesses have such apps; your attention has real value. Spend that on you – choose where you put your attention with care.

…Be here, now… Be present. Moments are fleeting, and our mortal lifetimes are brief.

I smile to myself like I know something. Maybe I do. Maybe I don’t. My results definitely vary. I’m having my own experience – and it’s real. I get back to the parking lot, which is filling with people and dogs. This is not my idea of a great time, so I wrap up my notes and my put my gear back in the car. Coffee would be good right about now, and it feels like a good opportunity to begin again.

Travelers on the same path are nonetheless each having their own experience.

Butterflies are a beautiful metaphor for change and growth. It is too early for butterflies on the meadow here. They come later. Interestingly, and perhaps in conflict with the whole “growth and change” metaphor in some way, butterflies have no choice. They will go through metamorphosis like it or not. We have a choice whether to learn, grow, and change or…not.

[No AI is used in writing or editing this blog. This is human content for human readers.]

I am thinking about butterflies because I appreciate them as a metaphor, not because there are (or, as is the case presently, are not) any actually around. We can choose change. Can choose “metamorphosis”, we can choose being and becoming.

The last couple of days I’ve taken time to illuminate a couple pages in my notebook (it’s really not a “journal”) for future writing. The pages delight me. The theme is butterflies, and growth and change. I haven’t written anything on these pages, maybe I won’t, ever. I enjoy the prepared pages, regardless, they are a thing all their own.

Butterflies on a page.

An unexpected yawn interrupts my thoughts. Crazy, I almost feel as if I could just lay down and sleep. It’s fully daylight on a lovely Spring morning, and I’m sitting at a favorite stopping point along the marsh trail, as it turns to meander past the meadow and through a stretch of oak savannah and down to the river, where there is a lovely viewpoint at which I rarely stop (too crowded, very popular).

One version of beginning again.

I had started down the trail from “the low end”, heading west, clockwise if viewed from above. Most people will start from the upper parking area, and take the year-round trail in a counterclockwise direction, getting to all the marked viewpoints quickly, and turning back. A few photographers will venture further, to the blind setup in the meadow looking towards the ponds, or the viewpoint less favored by walkers, which looks out over the meadow at “nothing”. The birdwatching folks like that one a lot. The meadow and grassy places between the oaks is dotted with patches of flowers, yellow or white or some hue of pink. The lupines are done and going to seeds. It is time now for wild mustard, daisies, and dandelions, and wild roses.

The view when I arrived was gray and overcast.

Sunshine comes and goes. I think about change and growth and becoming the person I most want to be. I think about how fortunate and grateful I am to enjoy the partnership I have with my Traveling Partner. It feels good to be so well cared for. Like a friend on a road trip who remembers to bring their GPS, he reliably “knows a great place to stop”, and helps me find my way, if only by joking about the scenery, or encouraging me to continue. Instead of each day being a new moment of dread and anxiety, each day brings a new opportunity to begin again in good company.

… We’re still each having our own experience…

Same view, different moment.

Sunshine breaks through the clouds again.  Self-care matters. We become what we practice. I stretch and squint into the sunshine. The meadow-fresh air smells of flowers and something spicy. The robins eye me between tasty morsels dug up from the leaf litter and soft soil beneath it. They sing bits of song at me, but I don’t speak robin. 😆 Perhaps they are reminding me that there is a whole day ahead? So many moments and opportunities to change! I remind myself I’ve got errands to run once I turn towards home on the other side of this walk.

For now I’ll just enjoy this moment. I can begin again later. Right now it is enough to breathe the Spring air and listen to birdsong, and think about metamorphosis – and practice. We become what we practice.

It’s early. A Spring morning on the edge of summer. The air is mild and the weather report confirms what my sinus headache already told me; the pollen counts are notable, and tree pollen, it suggests, is mostly oak. Well okay then, it could be worse. In the twilight of dawn just after daybreak, I can see that the meadow around the vineyard has been mowed. That’s probably not helping with this headache. I sigh to myself as I grab my cane and a spare pack of tissues, and step out of the car.

[No AI is used in writing or editing this blog. This is human content for human readers.]

Oaks trees line the trail under a cloudy sky.

I reach my halfway point feeling fairly certain I’d meant to be thinking other thoughts this morning. I may have had a clear topic or theme in mind. Doesn’t seem so now. I give in to the moment, set my device aside and meditate, instead.

My reverie is broken some time later by farm workers arriving to begin work in the vineyard nearest to the trail. This is followed a bit of a breeze, and a sneezing fit. The oaks stand tall and steady, unmoved by the hint of a breeze – or my sneezing.

I find myself wondering what this stand of old oaks has seen over the years. The oaks live long lives (or at least have that potential, though it’s likely very few reach truly advanced years these days), longer lives than ours. What might it be like to stand unmoved for hundreds of years as events unfold around me, quietly observing as changes come and go? That’s a whole lot of calm presence, and a reminder that mostly the upheaval or chaos of a given moment isn’t all that significant in the context of decades of time passing. Let time pass. Let small stuff stay small. I can choose the steady presence and long perspective of the oak to guide me down my path.

I smile to myself, thinking about the oaks that line the trail here, and the roses blooming in my garden. The deer nibble my roses, and this years blossoms are smaller, a timid second try after the large plump rose buds that came first were eaten by hungry does heavy with unborn fawns. The roses face that challenge with impressive resilience, putting out new shoots, branches, and buds, again and again after each visit.

The newest rose in the garden (Orange Honey) finally blooms.

I haven’t figured out how to discourage the deer without some sort of sturdy fence, but I’m barely trying, really. I have mixed feelings about it. I enjoy my roses. I enjoy seeing the deer. We’ve achieved an unsteady balance; they eat my roses in the early Spring each year, I enjoy the deer sightings, and by summer the roses are free to enjoy growing and blooming because the deer have moved on, to wherever they go.

I sit awhile reflecting on the resilience of the roses in my garden.

Nozomi blooming among the weeds.

There is a rose in my garden the deer don’t touch. “Nozomi” grows quite low to the ground and her long rambling canes reach out into the flower bed, and across the stepping stone on the short path between the front garden and lawn, and the side yard heading to the back deck. Her long canes are covered in hard sharply pointed thorns that easily tear flesh. She is the last rose I weed every time I get around to that task. 😆 The deer don’t bother with her tiny buds, pearl pink in the undergrowth, protected by thorns.

… Roses may seem fancy, but really they’re just sticker bushes with lovely flowers…

I fell in love with roses reluctantly, while living in Texas. The house we had moved into had three monstrously overgrown red roses that obscured the big front window, and a row of red miniature roses along the back fence. Knowing little and caring less, we cut the front roses down to size as if they were hedge shrubs. The minis in the back? My then-husband just mowed over them, cutting them to the ground. It seemed likely that would be the end of them, they were not thriving as it was. Within weeks, the front roses were covered in new buds and the minis in the back became a row of healthy new canes protruding from the lawn.

I didn’t expect such resilience from the roses… I thought they were some kind of fancy fussy thing, too much work to bother with. I was wrong. I was captivated.

Military life doesn’t lend itself reliably well to the permanence required for a rose to thrive. It would be years before I lived somewhere that I could plant roses. It would in fact be 1995 before I began planting roses in my yard, only to face having to move again too soon to see the outcome. I began keeping potted roses, miniatures mostly, and they moved with me from place to place over years until my beloved Traveling Partner and I bought our little house in 2020. Nozomi was one of the potted roses I’d had the longest (24 years). It was a joyful moment to plant her in the ground at long last.

I sit awhile longer, still, like the oaks trees nearby. I breathe, exhale, and relax. It’s another day. I contemplate the garden of my heart and consider the resilience of the rose and the steadfast calm of the oak. We become what we practice. We can choose the practices that create the person we most wish to become. As with any garden, there is weeding and watering to be done. I sigh contentedly to myself. Another work day ahead, but that time is not now, and this moment is mine.

… Where does wisdom come from? I find myself distracted by the question. It isn’t found in book learning. It isn’t an easily teachable thing, is it? Any real wisdom we gain as individuals, we develop within ourselves, from our experiences over time, self-reflection, and contemplation of our mistakes and successes, and consideration of the outcomes of each (which aren’t reliably good in any case). We choose a path and walk it. Gaining wisdom isn’t a given. I wonder where this path leads? What wisdom may develop along the way? I don’t look for the answer and let my thoughts wander on…

I watch the dawn become this new day. The oaks watch with me. We are each having our own experience. I breathe the Spring air, grateful that my allergy medication has eased my headache, and get to my feet. The clock is ticking and it’s time to begin again.

Seems to be very effective so far… probably doesn’t hurt that the path is mine, and that I choose it myself.

I feel pretty good this morning. I probably have my Traveling Partner to thank for that, this morning. I’m grateful for the care and consideration he shows me.

[No AI is used in writing or editing this blog. This is human content for human readers.]

Yesterday was a busy one at work. Busy and chaotic and filled with pressure to complete tasks. It was filled with “wins”, but also? It was a lot of work. Cognitive effort is still effort. Cognitive fatigue is still fatigue. Exhaustion doesn’t care how you got there. My capacity for manual labor and physically taxing tasks isn’t what it was at 30. The work I do now isn’t dependent on that. I can still manage to thoroughly exhaust myself over the course of a busy week or day. Yesterday, I returned home from work so completely “used up” that I could not visualize food sufficiently well to prepare a meal, and when my beloved suggested I should take some time to take care of myself and not just sit on the couch numbly hanging out with him (but not really present), I started crying. Fatigue.

He was right though; I very much needed to take care of myself rather urgently.

…If I had rejected his suggestion I might not be where I am this morning, relaxing at a favorite spot along a favorite trail as the sun rises, feeling merry and rested…

Sunrise

I chose self-care. I withdrew to a quiet room with my paper journal (it’s barely that, it’s more a combination coloring book, sticker collage, and poetry notebook) and my stickers. That doesn’t sound “grown up”, I know – but self-care isn’t about appearances or performance. I sat in a dimly lit room, resting my display-fatigued eyes for a little while. I meditated. In the stillness, notifications and phone silenced, I breathed and exhaled and relaxed, letting the stress of the exceptionally busy day recede into the past.  I looked over my stickers contentedly and began decorating a new page (with various sizes of colorful butterflies). Later I might add words to the page, a poem, a thought, something interesting I’ve noticed maybe. The result is a sort of illuminated book of…notions? It’s a very calming practice for me, and another contemplative practice I can choose when I need to nurture something within myself that has been spent.

… Your results may vary; choose nurturing restorative practices that work for you

Once I had rested my mind, my eyes, and my senses, I returned to the living room feeling much refreshed. The evening was a pleasant one spent hanging out in the good company of my beloved. I went to bed at the usual time (pretty early, but I’m up early, and trying to keep later hours hasn’t managed to shift that waking time at all). I slept well and deeply. I woke feeling fresh and ready to take on a new day, and another mile.

Self-care matters.

I promise myself that I will be more considerate of this fragile mortal vessel today. There is more work to be done. I remind myself to protect my time – and my peace – and to make wise choices about the quality and quantity of the media I consume. There’s a lot out there that has no relevance or importance to me at all, and there is no need to waste my attention on it.

I breathe, exhale, and relax. It’s a new day full of opportunities and choices. I remind myself to choose wisely. There is so much to learn and see and do in one mortal life, and it isn’t all about me, all the time. Life is bigger than that. Choose easy or choose hard, we’ve only got so much to give and our time is finite.

I’ll make my walk a short one today, my aching knee tells me that’s a smart choice. I’m grateful for my Leki trekking pole that is my everyday cane (very light weight, has some shock absorbtion built in). It has been durable and worth what I paid for it, some 10 years ago. I wonder again why we burden our elders with the poor quality rather heavy canes I see used commonly… don’t we care enough to make life just a little bit easier for our elders? Haven’t they worked hard enough already?

I sigh and get to my feet, ready to begin again.