An utterly routine and fairly effortless workday faded away and became a challenging commute – challenging, frustrating, and provoking moments of temper, until I realized I could use it as a way of practicing some good practices, like… responding versus reacting, and letting go of attachment to an outcome, and just… breathing. Commuter traffic as an opportunity to practice mindfulness…? Sure, why not? I was in the damned traffic, it was a suitably difficult experience, and honestly – I recognized I could handle it differently than I was handling it in that moment that caught me snarling at the driver ahead of me for being an asshole – doing what I’d just done myself a few blocks before. Not cool. Practice needed. lol

I got home full of intentions and planned to take on a full measure of self-care and housekeeping; I’d planned it that way, and I had the time to do it. Funny thing about plans, intentions, and time… they don’t naturally combine to result in achievement, without the addition of will and some verbs. Action is required. Movement. Process. Task completion. Again and again I sat down to chill. Again and again I got myself back up to do something that I wanted to see through to completion, either because it seemed needful or because it would enhance the quality of my experience of the moment. I definitely also wanted to just chill. lol The result was a strange mix of planned tasks being done, and an assortment of other more engaging (in the moment) things getting done instead of some of what I had planned. It seemed just fine last night. This morning I am irked by the things I didn’t get done, that’d I specifically wanted to do – and didn’t. (Like emptying the little trash cans that are tucked here and there all over the house… planned to do that, didn’t do that, irked about the one next to my desk right now not being emptied last night. lol)

I found time to enjoy the garden. Time well spent.

It remains true that getting anything at all done requires some verbs. I have to do the verbs. Put my plans in action. Follow through on my choices with activity that brings my plan to life as an outcome. It always sounds so effortless, in spite of the fact that I am specifically talking about the effort it does require. lol It’s that real-life effort that sometimes stalls me.

This morning, I write instead of emptying that fucking little trash can (and the others like it), but it is Tuesday – the last day to take the trash out before pick up on Wednesday morning. I smile and finish my coffee. There’s time to begin again. There are verbs involved. Sometimes adulting skillfully is every bit as much about just doing as it is practicing. 😉