I am greeted by a gray overcast dawn when I reach the trailhead, and it is cooler than most recent mornings, below 60°F. I’m grateful to have worn a sweater. I’m grateful to be in less pain today than yesterday, at least for now.
Yesterday was quite wonderful, shared with my Traveling Partner, and special for quite personal reasons. I smile thinking about it, and him. I’m grateful for how far he has come in his recovery from injury and surgery. So worth waiting for. Worth the time and work and tears that went into more than a year of caregiving to get here. Mt gratitude is all mixed up with my relief and my enduring passion for this human being I love so deeply.
I breathe, exhale, and relax. I’m grateful my time between jobs has been brief. I’m excited about tomorrow and many more tomorrows to come. I’m grateful, too, for my own positive outlook, and the self-work, and therapy, and the valued perspectives of friends and colleagues that helped get me to this more positive place in life.
I walked down the trail, grateful to be walking, and grateful to find a favorite stopping point unoccupied. Small things matter, too, and are worthy of my appreciation and gratitude. I feel uplifted and light.
My tinnitus, as bad as it is, doesn’t aggravate me nearly as much, nor as often, now that I’ve got the hearing aids. No, they don’t diminish it at all in any measurable way, but in practical terms I’m forced to notice it a bit less often. It’s enough that it definitely improves my subjective experience. I’m grateful for that. I listen to my steps as I walk the trail. I listen to birdsong and breezes, and the sound of distant voices somewhere on the trail.
Summer is nearly over. Autumn is approaching quickly. The cooler morning tells the tale. My mind wanders ahead to holidays that don’t require my attention at all quite yet, and I’m grateful to feel eager to enjoy those when they come. I’m grateful to live in circumstances that allow for such celebrations – the heartfelt joy in a holiday celebration is one of the high points of a human life.
I sigh to myself, mostly out of contentment, and a little simply to enjoy the deep breath of cool meadow air. No colorful sunrise, I’m grateful for the dawn in spite of the gray overcast sky. I watch the swallows flit quickly through the air, darting here and there so quickly.
There was a time, more than a dozen or so years ago, when it wouldn’t have occurred to me to practice gratitude in a willful, considered, and deliberate way. Making gratitude one positive practice among many has been part of a steady and fairly profound improvement in my outlook and even my practical quality of life. I feel better more of the time than I once did. Hell, I didn’t know that some of these nuanced positive emotions even existed until I made some changes in my approach to life generally (one of those changes being to make a practice of gratitude). They’ve been a delight to experience and to savor, and I’m grateful for that, too.
I smile thinking about yesterday, and love and partnership, and how truly fortunate I am in so many ways. I look down the path ahead, humbled by my good fortune and grateful for my opportunities. Tomorrow isn’t here, yet… I’m ready to embrace change. I’m ready to begin again – and I’m grateful for the chance to do that. I hear the geese calling overhead. The season is changing. The clock is ticking. It’s time to walk on.
Evening Light 