Archives for category: Metaphors
The time is...now.

The time is…now.

I figured I’d share this bit with you. This particular moment feels wrapped in quiet. The house is dim. Only the light overhead remains, dimmed low for a notion of ambience at some other point in time. It is the last hour completing 50 years of life. I don’t have any particular reason to give for why this particular birthday feels so significant to me. Is it ‘where I am’ in my life? Is it the progress I am making…in life, in love, in work, in…damn, is there any facet of me that I’m not taking a hard look at these days? My experience is that I’m enjoying ‘my experience’ more, generally, and sleeping a lot betterย  – I feel pretty balanced most of the time, and even the hormonal ups and downs are no longer calling the shots.ย  It all seems so mundane in text.

How is it that it feels so significant to face this moment, this place, this…now? 50…in minutes. Oh, I know, I know – just as with ‘end time’ prophesies, or the Y2K scare, tomorrow will be tomorrow. A day. Each moment a new now. I will be who I am. My lovers will be who they are. Love and life will continue in whatever way they will, based on circumstances and choices.ย  I will be 50. So will a lot of other people. Hell, Johnny Depp is 50, or so I read a day or two ago. He seems timeless to me, but I guess someone, somewhere, is probably keeping track of that detail. lol. 50, though, how important is it really? It isn’t. Time is pretty arbitrary, I think. Doesn’t it matter more what we do with it, than that it is?

I had considered something long, and detailed, and nostalgic for this post. Today has been my last day before I am 50. I’ve had a certain sense that I am ‘closing out the first half’…but it’s entirely internal.ย  Based on events and conversations, it’s clear that this is not an experience everyone shares…or perhaps it is difficult to identify with [or care about! lol] from some other vantage point in time? I don’t think I’d have been able to connect with such a thing at 21. Maybe not even at 30. Will I care about 50 when I am 70? It seems unlikely. So…I took some time to be alone with this last hour…just me and…me. Well, and you. Thanks for sharing the moment with me. ๐Ÿ™‚

‘Now’ has gotten to be a pretty big deal for me, lately. I’ve learned some things about my values, too, and who I am…and who I am becoming. 50 years is a lot of ‘past’. Some of it will likely live on, isolated within my memory, for as long as the wreckage in my head and in my heart lasts, but what then? Is success forgetting? Is healing really something within reach for me? Who am I when I am whole? What does the world look like through those glasses? Do nightmares really go away? Then what?

This is getting long, and without any particular point. I’ll be 50 tomorrow. That’s when the second half starts, and instead of spending a long while writing, perhaps weeping, and wading through a lifetime of emotions I have already felt, about events I have already experienced, I want to come back to now. This right here. Not quite 50, almost done with 49…timeless in a dark room, the quiet tap of my fingers on the keyboard, the hush of the air purifier, and the house sounds creating this quiet made of sounds that seems more dense and solitary than quiet is intended to be. Now. I will set this aside, finished (do we need more words between us now, in this stillness together?) and end the first half in thought, cradled in a very nice ‘now’ indeed, and eager to wake and celebrate how far I’ve come, and how worth it the journey is proving to be.

Tomorrow…well, it’ll be ‘now’, then, won’t it? lol

Blackberries - summer comes.

Blackberries – summer comes.

What a lovely weekend. I’m rather hopelessly infatuated with my new aquarium, and Saturday the first fish moved in to their new home. I’m delighted, awe-struck, and captivated. I’m distracted with joy. What an awesome birthday present, from my partners. Life. A tiny universe to nurture, care for, and observe; planned and assembled with great care and attention…

…in 3 days, I am 50.

I started this thinking I had more to say about it than that. I could talk about romance, relationship building, passion, love…or share some thoughts on things, or give credit where due, or perhaps say a long overdue thanks, or express a heartfelt sentiment, or…but here I sit, now. This lovely gentle now. This brilliant extraordinarily pleasant now. This one moment, right here. This one. I don’t know – suddenly I feel as if the one thing I want most to share here, which is now, isn’t something I can share in words, at all. The notion immediately robbed me of words. Maybe more words tomorrow? For me, for now, simply now will be enough.

Simple delight. Now. Enough.

Simple delight. Now. Enough.

I am feeling tired today, on a different level, as if my heart or perhaps my ‘soul’ is fatigued and needing rest. Hormones, probably. Or some other simple fundamental of being human, perhaps.ย  I slept well enough, although I woke once or twice briefly, and of course ahead of the alarm clock when my night ended.ย  I’m eating well and taking care of my nutritional needs.ย  I’m getting good regular exercise, and I’m not taking medications I don’t need, and those at the lowest effective dose of the most reliable Rx available at this time.ย  I’m staying with new mindfulness and meditation practices, and yoga, and attending to the needs of my spirit and my heart by ensuring I take time for people and things I love.ย 

Memories and daydreams mingle as I approach 50. "Sunset on the River" 1994 and 2011. Oil on Canvas

Memories and daydreams mingle as I approach 50.
“Sunset on the River” 1994 and 2011. Oil on Canvas

…and I’m tired.ย  I feel a bit like I am momentarily ‘paused’ to re-buffer… or something… When my mind is still and quiet I feel the unease of dissatisfaction more clearly.ย  I’m uncomfortable facing it.ย  What am I afraid of? Change? There’s so much of that of late I don’t see that it would be all that remarkable. lol.ย  Hormones. I will be so glad when the over-rationalized, highly resented, chemical driver of my experience ebbs like the tide.ย  I daydream that I will be suddenly ‘more sane’ and calmer… I hope not to be disappointed. LOL Maybe I am just a madwoman after all? I do wonder, sometimes…

The ‘first half’ is nearly at an end… a dear friend who heard about my new aquarium adventure remarked “one must adjust the temporal currents in ones own body and mind in order to commune with the fish.ย  it will be very beneficial to your journey, i believe.”ย  I’m sure she’s right on both points.ย  So, ever onward…50 staring me in the face, and when I stare back I see it pretty clearly some days.ย  Still…overall I’m pretty happy. Overall I’m pretty satisfied with most things. Overall I’m in good health, and reasonably rational.ย  It’s hard to bitch about feeling tired, or share some existential angst, knowing how many friends, family, and acquaintances are really struggling.ย  Harder still to deal with feeling dissatisfied about things that suddenly look awfully small when I consider the pain and turmoil in our global community. Am I finally becoming a grown up? lol.

7 days to 50…

10…yesterday…and it was a good day. A day I experienced as ‘joyous’ and ‘busy’ and ‘delightful’. Yesterday I set up my aquarium – my birthday present from my loves. I’m so excited about it that sometimes I can’t contain my delight and it spills over onto everyone around me as words – a lot of words – chatter, really, like an excited child. I’m ok with that. It isn’t harmful. lol. I would take a million pictures of it, but honestly – it’s rocks and plants and a couple snails for now, and as excited as I am, I can admit there isn’t enough ‘going on’ to take more than a picture or two at this point. lol. I’m ok with that – so eager and excited I’d happily go home straight away, work half finished, and just sit watching the bubbles rise, and the snails creeping. ๐Ÿ˜€ย  Simple pleasures.

Excitement, adventure, and life...better than television.

Excitement, adventure, and life…better than television.

9…today…fatigue and hormones. A good morning, somehow rather ‘grown up’ and not particularly playful. I woke in a wonderful mood from a deep sleep, and not much inclined toward the serious side of life, but life doesn’t always inquire before she gets started on my day. <shrugs> I’m having a good day – but I feel fatigued to the point of wanting to ‘just lay down for a minute’…except I’m at work, and they frown on that sort of thing. LOL What am I missing? I slept, I managed my calories, I had my usual amount of caffeine at the usual intervals [=junkie, yes I know, as vices go, it is of no significance]…I’m just…so…tired…ย  Hormones more than likely. Shall we skip discussing that mess in a graphic way? Either you ‘get it’ and it is part of your direct or indirect experience, or you don’t. Maybe we can talk more when I’m alert – and hostile toward the world. I always find plenty to say about it then. lol. Should be another couple days… O_0

...and now for a change of topic...

…and now for a change of topic…

The garden is lovely – and we’ve added a greenhouse! I’ve wanted one for so long. My dear Granny had one, attached to a big big house out in the countryside – when she lived out in the countryside, with a house full of kids. I remember the smell of it, and the warmth that would soak into my bones right away, and the feeling that sunshine was somehow eternal under those glass panes. I remember her potting bench, the different sizes of terra cotta pots, and the soil and her trowel.ย  I remember her teaching me to re-use broken pottery – a broken pot makes a good toad house, and there were so many toads in the yard! I feel a momentary twinge of sadness as I realize how rarely I see a toad in the garden these days. Still, it is a lovely June, and my birthday is nine days away…there is life everywhere! The rose garden, full of blooms, the greenhouse with the tray of seedlings growing and becoming ready for pots, the aquarium and the gentle greenery shifting in the current, soon to be home to new creatures, more life…wow. Life. I’m glad I am here. I’m glad it is now.

"Circus Clown" in bloom.

“Circus Clown” in bloom.

"Graham Thomas" showing off next to an undefeatable root stock rose - there's a metaphor there, I'm sure...

“Graham Thomas” showing off next to an undefeatable root stock rose – there’s a metaphor there, I’m sure…

Not a rose at all! A lovely peony at the edge of the rose garden.

Not a rose at all! A lovely peony at the edge of the rose garden.

I want so much to believe she is "Splish-Splash" but I seriously doubt it...possibly "irresistible"? Well, sure...she's a rose.

I want so much to believe she is “Splish-Splash” but I seriously doubt it…possibly “irresistible”? Well, sure…she’s a rose.

Green, purple, sunshine, clouds...the garden; life.

Green, purple, sunshine, clouds…the garden; life.

50 in 9 days.

I have a strange relationship with Time. It begins in the morning of every new day, when I wake before my alarm goes off. I set it for 5am, but it rarely has a chance to go off, I usually wake minutes or seconds in advance, and shut it off. 4:58 am, 4:52 am, 4:46 am; never even a moment after 5am, even when my alarm is turned off for the weekend. Strangely, I don’t rely on that, and failing to be certain my alarm is set and turned on generally results in a night of restless sleep, waking again and again to check the time. I don’t set my alarm for an increment of time that isn’t on the hour, the half hour, or more rarely the quarter-hour. It seems pretty arbitrary and more a matter of habit or tradition than any rational choice about an ideal moment to wake.

Isn’t Time rather arbitrary, anyway? I mean, the math bits and science bits are certain to be important to someone, somewhere…but, my subjective experience with Time often finds me winding my way back to ‘why do I put myself through this when it seems so…imaginary?’ I don’t have a comfortable experience with Time. I rush myself, too often. I pile expectations of punctuality on my demands of myself that result in bitter emotional battles with myself, or others, over some occasion of minor lateness – in the face of a lifetime of time-based brutality directed at myself. I’m rarely late by my own actions; it freaks me out. When circumstances or people ‘make me late’ I’ve been known to unleash an amount of emotion and temper that is most easily described as ‘desperate and enraged’ – an unpleasant combination. I’m sure the origins of my troubled relationship with Time is lost in the darkness of ancient pain, and a lovely Sunday doesn’t yield to further exploration. Not right now, when I’m having such a good time. ๐Ÿ™‚

This morning I was thinking about alarm clocks, agendas, and time and those thoughts resurfaced later while I was meditating. I suddenly felt so aware of something I’ve fought for so long… the only time I really benefit from concerning myself with is…now.ย  Well, hell… I have time for that. ๐Ÿ˜‰

...some metaphor about time...

…some metaphor about time…