Archives for posts with tag: TBI

Before I take another step, I’ll just say “Wow, what a good week”. Credit where credit is due; mindfulness practices, careful choices, and a will to avoid misunderstandings and assumptions are all making a huge difference, or so it seems so far this week, and the vibe at home is very supportive and inclusive much of the time, which fosters growth and change.

This morning I woke anxious after a good night’s sleep. It wasn’t the sort of major panic that brings me to my feet in alarm and puts me in motion before I can think things over, but it was there and my attention was on it when I woke. A glance at the clock and I was relieved that it was definitely to early to bother get up – it’s a Saturday – so attempt 1 to deal with it was somewhat dismissive and irritated, and of the ‘roll over and go back to sleep’ variety.  ( If you have an anxiety issue, yourself, you likely know how that went – the derisive hoots of laughter can be halted any time. lol.) Yeah, so I dozed a few minutes, woke up again – still anxious. ‘F*ck it’, I thought, I am so not getting up early today. Attempt 2 was a trip down the hall for an old school fix ‘get a drink of water and go back to bed’. Right, right. Sometimes it takes me a while to learn new things.  After another few minutes of napping, I was awake again, and this time the clock was pretty near to meeting my morning’s internal ‘suggested waking time’ for the day… damn it.  That‘s when I re-engaged my actual brain, and went through some basic breathing and mindfulness exercises I’ve been practicing all week… and my heart rate started to slow down, my breathing became deeper and more relaxed, my jaw unclenched…and the feeling of anxiety subsided. I was just about to get up when…I realized I’d fallen back to sleep! After my unexpected nap, I woke in a much better place, feeling gently aligned inside myself and pretty calm and centered.  I’m not sure what else to say about this morning…somewhere there’s a hippie thinking ‘I told you so’? lol. Damn it. Nothing to do now but have a quad latte and do some yoga. 😀

So, here it is, Saturday at the tail end of a good week. I think I’ll leave the ‘why am I anxious’ questions off my To Do list completely – because I don’t think ‘why’ actually matters right now. I think I will also refrain from making any assumptions about the feeling itself, as it comes and goes unexpectedly, today. I’m not going looking for answers about anxiety this morning – it’s a lovely easy Saturday, and I will enjoy that about my experience and continue to practice letting small things go, and not taking other people’s experience personally. So, maybe a walk later, and an opportunity to snap some close ups of small things, and a couple errands, and later some plotting and scheming…er… ‘planning’… Sunday dinner. (One of my most fun things every week is cooking Sunday dinner for all of us, and this week I don’t yet have even a notion what I might like to do.)

I hope the Saturday ahead of you is wide open with possibilities and that your choices bring you only the best outcomes. If it gets weird or scary for you, hang on for the ride, and take a minute to just chill and breathe.  It’s been working for me, pretty well.  🙂

A second post; it seems less rare these days to find myself writing more words…a second thought, second look… wait a second…(now I’m just having some fun). The thing is, I just feel good today – even playful. Free. As if Life took a deep breath and relaxed. I suspect that it was actually me. 🙂

So, that TED talk on vulnerability really dovetails with other things I am reading, practicing, thinking, doing – and sharing it is just the only decent thing.   Seriously, I’m probably solo for a couple of hours this evening and if so, I am watching it again – with my whole being.

I had a pretty spectacularly ordinary very good day – it has been pleasantly orderly, and interestingly spontaneous, and all without being overwhelming.  I got some shopping done and found my way to some good places: a market, an art supply store, and an art community.  Painting is very much on my mind, and I took the opportunity to round out my watercolor supplies today, and enjoyed a few moments of fun playing with those and getting organized.  It’s actually a little strange to find myself so excited about painting in watercolor again – when I easily could have been doing so at any point I cared to, all along.  How did I miss that I wanted this?

Now day begins to turn to evening under a cottony gray sky with only a threat of rain, and I have satisfied my initial urgent need to see new work with an unimpressive but pleasing sketch of a crumpled receipt in India ink and graphite.  It was a short night, and as my excitement begins to wane I recognize fatigue, and the calm of utter contentment.  (49 years old and I’ll probably be asleep by 9pm! I certainly didn’t envision this when I stared hungrily at the horizon of impending adulthood as a ‘tween. lol) …But…this feels good…really good.  Have I misunderstood what ‘happy’ actually is, all this time?  A thought for another day, another post, another moment to consider what’s going well, and what is working in some other time and space – for now, this right here is enough.

I’ve struggled so much for so long ‘to feel heard’… and frankly, we have built a global culture that commonly overlooks the voices of women, and that hurts all by itself, but it hit me…  If I live my own life, on my own terms, treating myself well…choosing my values based on my own judgement and understanding of my experience and circumstances, and living them… building healthy relationships based on mutual respect, reciprocity, and treating each other well… and experiencing my life in a ‘mindful’ way… will I still ‘feel unheard’? Is the person who is not hearing me… me?  It certainly seems like a thought worth pursuing.

Have years of rage, despair, and frustration actually been entirely about me, treating myself well, feeling compassion for my own experience… hearing myself?  It feels a little… selfish. Me, me me… and I hear others reminding me ‘it isn’t all about me’… but some of it is ‘all about me’… and I find myself facing conflict head on within myself. The battle for real understanding of what is ‘all about me’ and what is not… learning to heal, learning to exist comfortably in my own experience of life, and learning who I am, and how to treat myself well… maybe once I am done with that, I can learn to love well, too. 😀

I’ve managed to turn a few other odd notions on their heads in the past couple days… just at the moment I am awed at what an amazing experience this really is. (Nice job, Brain.)

A very good Tuesday…

It’s a good Tuesday. It’s a good day for any day of the week. Nothing extraordinary about it, just chill and good… The mindfulness practices and reading that I have been doing seems to be getting me… somewhere. Somewhere good. For now I don’t have a lot more to say about it – I don’t know enough.  There is a part of me that would like to say ‘Mindfulness, eh? Who knew?’ but I can’t even form the words without thinking about thousands of years of mindfulness practices, traditions, philosophies and beliefs that exist. I am getting to the party rather late. lol.

Will ‘everything be alright’? I don’t know. Will I find peace and happiness, or at least lasting contentment? I don’t know that either. I do know that asking myself different questions, and being more fully aware in my experience has value for me right now. I’m good with that – it’s a nice start to something better.  There are a lot of things going on around me to enjoy, observe, and experience.

Yesterday was good – pretty awesome, actually, and I have the sense that I gained understanding on a couple of things that are very relevant to me right now.  Today is, too, a nice reminder that setting internal expectations has the potential to alter experience itself, or color it consistent with the chosen definitions and map; I didn’t ‘anticipate the day’, and I am exploring just living it. Less dread. Less fear. Less doubt. Nice change.

Enjoy your Tuesday, you only get one this week. 😉