Archives for posts with tag: taking time for me

I took yesterday and stepped away from the daily routine and invested some of my precious time in me. I spent the day downtown, window-shopping, walking unfamiliar streets as often as I walked more familiar ones, getting my hair cut, and visiting the Chinese Garden. I must have needed this wee break from the ordinary; by day’s end I felt as though I’d enjoyed a long weekend. Choices and verbs – they’re not always a mandate, an obligation, or a necessity, and I can use them to my obvious advantage, and quite likely would benefit from doing so more often. 🙂

Sometimes a lovely day is simply a lovely day.

Sometimes a lovely day is simply a lovely day.

The day was a delight, and finished well, too. This morning, the feeling of contentment lingers. It’s quite a lovely feeling, and definitely worth the investment of time, will, and choice.

I am in a substantial amount of pain today, but for the moment it seems pretty inconsequential. I am reminded what a powerful mind-body connection pain has in my experience when I observe ‘how good I feel’ while also observing how much  pain I am in; the investment in treating myself well, and building my emotional resilience, provides some protection from being overwhelmed by the pain, and more easily able to observe and manage it, without being swallowed whole by a more negative experience. Oh, sure, I still have some practices and verbs that must be attended to, if I want to maintain this positive outcome (the yoga that improves my mobility, the good nutrition and exercise that maintain bone strength, the meditation that builds emotional balance, and mindfulness practices that ensure I am aware of what I need for good self-care, all matter). Good self-care is not a quick trip to a convenience store, as journey’s go, it’s more like a very long through-hike on a well-marked, memorized route that suffers from scenery so varied that it is quite easy to be distracted to the point of standing still. In almost every moment, I find something I could handle a little better, to my great benefit; there is always more to practice.

Enjoying a moment mindfully is a moment well spent.

Enjoying a moment mindfully is a moment well spent.

Good practices – and the tools that build them – come from a lot of sources, for me. Yesterday I found a new one hidden in a frustrating moment – a bit like finding a plastic Easter egg, opening it up, and discovering a gold coin of great value within. An application I use on my phone updated, and the update has stopped my password from saving; I have to log in each and every time I open the app – or change from one activity within it to another. I’m ‘not wired for frustration’ – it’s one of my biggest challenges, emotionally. Frustration is my nemesis, my kryptonite, my icy highway – when I experience frustration it undercuts my emotional resilience almost instantly, and all to often some horrible tantrum ensues. It’s ugly. It occurred to me at this unlikely moment, struggling with unwanted tears, and trembling hands, that as hard as the frustration itself is, I could use this particular challenge as a ‘safe’ opportunity to really practice handling frustration, due to its predictability, and lack of direct connection to the experience of any loved one! Nice. I spent the remainder of that train ride going to that app, and breathing through the frustration, and practicing dialing it down with will and mindful attention to it. It ended up being both worthwhile and entertaining (although not quite ‘fun’). 🙂

Choices and perspective have a relationship to each other; we choose much of what we see, we limit what we are aware of.

Choices and perspective have a relationship to each other; we choose much of what we see, we limit what we are aware of.

Today is another day, another opportunity to practice the very best practices. Today is another day to smile, and to choose my actions and my words with great care, so as not to weaponize them. Today is another day to put myself at the top of my agenda. Today is another day to listen with my whole attention, and consider each interaction as an opportunity for growth and connection. Today is a good day to cherish the world, and savor my experience.

I don’t know what it is about brunch. Maybe that the menu is sometimes delightfully unexpected? Possibly it has more to do with the profoundly leisure characteristic of ‘brunch’. No one has ‘a quick brunch on the way to work’. Having brunch is about taking time, slowing down, and stepping away from the routine sorts of meals of the work week. I rarely see signs advertising weekday brunches; brunch is for days off. I like leisure. Brunch is also not a solo meal. I may have a mid-morning or noontime meal composed of foods that are both ‘breakfast’ and ‘lunch’ – but if I am doing so alone, I don’t call it brunch. (I call it scrounging for something to eat, most likely. lol)  Brunch is probably my favorite meal if I had to choose one…or perhaps tea…or ‘tiffin‘, but that last is simply because I enjoy how it feels to say the word. lol

Many years ago, a work colleague (who would prove to be a most loyal friend of many years) left our shared employment. My reaction surprised me at the time; I felt insecure about losing touch with him. Deeply so. I didn’t really ‘get it’, and the medications I was on at the time weren’t helping me with that. I did what made sense at the time. I invited him out to brunch the following Sunday. For a long time – years? – we continued to ‘do brunch’, now and then even ‘breakfast’ (generally earlier, on the way to somewhere), regularly and frequently. We tried out brunch spots all over the area. I look back on those experiences as being some of the best times of those years. Loyal friends are rare enough, add that to a routine of a leisurely and excellent brunch and I find that any time I recall it, that experience is an experience I want to repeat.

I was just on the edge of writing a lot of words about emotions, friends, investing in what I enjoy most…sometimes it is enough just to do. Life is about verbs and choices.

Today is a good day for brunch with a friend.

It's about the conversation more than the coffee.

It’s about the conversation more than the coffee.

I finished 2013 softly. Family, friends, the occasional peek at Facebook, an informal spread of tasty treats, great conversation, good music, some visual entertainment; I didn’t plan, and it wasn’t at all organized, and delightfully it all fell into place quite easily. It wasn’t elaborate. It wasn’t noisy. It wasn’t stressful. At 8 minutes to midnight, guests had already gone, one partner was already headed to bed. The New Year arrived softly, with a hug, a kiss, and soft laughter about being cool with going to bed before midnight.

Moments before midnight, the neighbors reminded the world they exist, with a wasteful display of ordnance fired over the rooftops. I generally don’t mind that sort of thing, myself, but it drives the dogs mad with stress. The household was no longer on the verge of sleep.  The flurry of activity involved with pacifying the startled canines roused the household, put everyone on alert, and delayed sleep a bit.  The house quieted down quickly afterward, and 2013 was over.

It’s a new year.

I woke early, around 4:00 am. The idea of getting up at 4:00 am after going to sleep sometime after midnight didn’t make sense. I went back to sleep. I woke again, around 5:30 am. I made the same decision without really waking up completely.  I finally woke, slowly unfolding to a truly waking consciousness, aware that it was a new day. It was 7:00 am. I could have slept longer… only… 2014!! 😀

My intention was to spend the initial hour or so of this new day, new year, new beginning in solitary contemplation of … stuff.  I’m glad I didn’t set expectations with myself about when, precisely, that might happen. lol.

Today, I’ll be taking some time to consider the New Year, to consider what I want out of my life, how to best become the woman I most want to be, and to set new goals and priorities.  I do it every year, on New Year’s Day. This year, I do it mindfully, with self-compassion, and a foundation of contentment.

Okay, 2014 – let’s see what you’ve got!

No rush... there are 364 days before 2015!

No rush… there are 364 days before 2015!