Archives for posts with tag: Let the rain fall

My tinnitus is bad this morning. I’ve got headphones on, no music playing, just sort of… seeking quiet. Doesn’t matter; the shimmering, ringing, chiming, faint high-pitched whine that persists in my ears 24/7 is notably loud this morning. I hear more than one frequency, more than one tone, various “noises” – a cacophony of background noise that never really lets up.

…I have another sip of my coffee, and look for YouTube content to distract me from the ringing in my ears. Listening to the tinnitus, itself, is a poor practice; as I begin to focus on it, over time, it becomes harder to hear anything else. A function of attention, perhaps, more than volume. Distractions help, some.

I notice the time, earlier than “usual” – more properly, earlier than the alarm was set. My Traveling Partner’s restless night woke me early, and rather than fight the inevitable, I just went ahead and got up. More time in the small gym at the office, I suppose. The exercise is healthy, and I value the opportunity. For now, I just chill here, with the ringing in my ears, drinking my coffee.

It’ll be time to begin again, soon enough. This moment, here, now, seems well-suited to meditation. I find something to drown out the ringing in my ears… this will do nicely. ๐Ÿ™‚

With the return of the rain, I have a sense that autumn approaches; seasons change.

Sipping coffee and thinking about time, timing, and the peculiar fascination, and sometimes urgency, that we have with getting to a goal “ahead of schedule” or “on time” – turning any such moment into some kind of race to some arbitrary finish line. Doesn’t it suck the fun out of a drive in the countryside, if we’re so focused on getting to a destination by a specific point in time? We’ve put our experience in the hands of circumstances. Slow drivers. Detours. Traffic. (Metaphors.)

Yesterday, my morning was less about time and timing, than about enjoying a few minutes for myself, before I headed to work. I left the house at some wildly random time, rather later than I generally do, arriving a bit later than I ordinarily might, still well within expectations of timeliness, and utterly without any internal pressure to get there. No racing. No rushing. It was lovely. Sipping my coffee, I think about doing that more often. ๐Ÿ™‚

Rain drops on roses.

In the garden, in the evening, after the work day was behind me, I took an unhurried look around. No agenda. Just enjoying the moment. I had enjoyed some pleasant moments of conversation with my Traveling Partner on the phone. The evening was a simple one; I did some tidying up. I had a bite of dinner. I relaxed with a book. I went to bed a bit later than the night before, early enough to get a great night’s sleep… if my body would have been amendable to that. lol My interrupted sleep has not prevented me having a lovely morning, and I feel decently well-rested. No harm done. ๐Ÿ™‚

Life feels simple and mostly pretty easy, from the perspective of this morning. No idea what the day holds; it’s been a busy week at work, and a great many people, colleagues, and customers, seem to have strange priorities much more to do with external forces that drive them, than well-considered choices they have made for themselves. I grin to myself in the early morning light; not my circus, not my monkeys. I keep my focus on my own life, my own choices, and being the woman I most want to be – more so, each day. It’s the best I can do, I think. ๐Ÿ™‚

Sufficiency is pretty comfortable, generally.

A soft rain is falling, this morning. I finish my coffee, and begin again. ๐Ÿ™‚

It looks icy outside, but I hear rain falling, and the temperature is above freezing. I expect things will be slushy, but not impassable and I prepare to make the commute into the office. I do all the usual waking up things, all the usual getting the day started things, and sit down with my coffee. I listen to the rain continue to fall. I think about the winter weather, and how fortunate I am to live within generally secure walls, with heat, running water, and modern conveniences like an internet connection of my own.

I meant to do more this weekend than I did. I mostly relaxed by the fire, reading. Time well-spent. I did not make the necessary treks back and forth across the icy parking lot needed to do laundry. I did not venture forth to grocery shop (although I did go out to my small garden plot at one point yesterday to harvest kale and carrots for my meal). I did not do more housekeeping than necessary to maintain order, clean counter tops, and a sink empty of dishes. I took time to relax. Just that. It was pretty luxurious – and it’s probable that had the weather been nicer, I would have chosen differently. I guess I’m glad it snowed. ๐Ÿ™‚

I spent quite a lot of time bird-watching over the weekend. Yesterday was so icy the marsh was completely frozen over. When I put out drinking water for the birds and creatures in the afternoon, even the heron came all the way to the patio for a bite to eat and a drink of water. So many kinds of birds visited yesterday. I saw a hummingbird check the feeder; it was frozen. I quickly brought it indoors, knocked the ice out of it, and refilled it with nectar; they could at least get what they needed until it froze again. This seemed a popular choice with the handful of hummingbirds that came around within minutes, queuing up in mid-air, taking turns, and zipping away. Mine is not the only feeder being maintained through the winter; they have other stops to make.

The rain continues to fall. The sound of it holds my attention. It distracts me again and again. I enjoy the sound of it. It seems a good morning to set writing aside, and have my second coffeeย sitting quietly in the stillness before dawn, listening to the rain fall. Today, that’s enough. ๐Ÿ™‚