Archives for posts with tag: meditation

I arrived at the trailhead, sunrise well underway. It’s a cloudy morning, but the sort that hints at a sunny afternoon to come, more than it suggests rain. I start down the trail thinking about roses. Everything is green and beautiful and the air smells sweetly of fragrant wildflowers and mown grass. Wild roses are blooming along the trail.

One of several varieties that grow in the area.

The scent of the roses is particularly delightful and (for me) evocative. I have so many memories that are triggered by the scents of roses. When my Dear Friend died I added a wee “memory garden” to a corner of the yard, and added roses there (not that I didn’t have quite a few already, but these were chosen specifically with her in mind). I smile as I walk; the roses in my memory garden are blooming (well, two out of three). It’s their first year blooming. They’re quite lovely and smell wonderful. I shared pictures to my Dear Friend’s bestie. I know how painful missing such a friend can be.

“Rainbow Happy Trails” blooming

I have fond memories of talking about our gardens together, my Dear Friend and I. I have such memories of my late Granny, too, and my Mother. Many of my memories of times shared with my Dad are also gardening related. It seems proper to honor them in my garden. Memorial Day is tomorrow, and it also seems proper to be thinking of long gone friends, family, and loved ones, this morning. The sky overhead seems somber without being gloomy. I’m not grieving, just remembering.

“Whimsy” also blooming, her very first.

Funny how meaningful roses (and my garden) have become for me. Most of my roses tell a love story through the careful selections, each name hinting at the profound love I share with my Traveling Partner. Tokens of my affection, reminders of how complicated love can sometimes be. I chuckle to myself; my partner cares little for flowers, but loves me so deeply that my roses matter to him, if only because they matter to me.

“Alchymist” blooming in spite of being delicious to passing deer.

Some of my roses have their own stories to tell, having traveled in pots with me for some 25 years before being planted into the ground. Others captivated me so thoroughly that in spite of failures, I’ve continued to replace them. Still others, I yearn to plant in my garden even knowing they may not be suited to the space I’ve got left. lol Funny to be so passionate about roses. I wasn’t always, and there’s a story there too, perhaps for another day.

“Baby Love” blooming first, last, and almost all year long. Purchased the year my partner and I moved in together.

I get to my halfway point with my thoughts. The scent of roses reaches me from some unseen rose on the meadow somewhere. I have the trail to myself this morning, in spite of the holiday weekend, mild weather, and relative lateness of the hour. I listen to the breeze rustling the meadow grass. I am sitting in a low spot a hillside behind me. I feel “invisible” and safe. The busy squirrels, robins, and jays don’t mind my quiet presence. I watch them contentedly as I write, reflect and meditate.

Lovely morning for it.

I let minutes pass, grateful for the solitary time. I manage to miss my Traveling Partner, in spite of enjoying this solitary moment. He is more dear to me than I have words for. My garden is getting a bit weedy because I’ve chosen to enjoy my partner’s company rather than “do my chores” more than a few times over the past couple of weeks. I’m not complaining about that, it’s a worthy choice and the moments in a human lifetime are finite, each unrepeatable and unique. The time we spend together is undescribably precious.

… I smile, thinking about the number of my roses (and roses I’ve had in the past since 2010) that I’ve chosen with my beloved in mind. It’s many. It is, actually, almost every new rose I’ve chosen since we became friends, even before we were lovers, and eventually married. Of the 13 roses currently in my garden, 7 celebrate him (and us). Of the remaining roses in my garden, three are long-time favorites that are meaningful to me for other reasons, and three are the new ones I planted in the “memory garden”.

“Nozomi” with me 25 years, and one of the first roses I ever purchased from rose breeder Ralph Moore directly, though it wasn’t one of his.

I hear voices and the crunch of other steps on the trail. I sigh quietly to myself, sitting quite still for a moment, smiling when I notice that the squirrel nearby has done the same thing. We sit quite still, waiting to see what may come around the bed. Strangers call a friendly greeting as they approach and wave as they pass. I wave back and smile. We’re each having our own experience, but understand each other. We are enjoying this trail, this lovely Spring morning, and the scent of meadow flowers.

It’s a rather ordinary morning. My head is filled with thoughts of roses and the memories they evoke. I sit with my thoughts, and try to work out ways to discourage the deer from eating my roses. It’s quite a puzzle. I sigh to myself and plan to stop by the garden store on my way home, and get to my feet. The clock is ticking. It’s time to begin again.

My birthday is coming up, just weeks away. 21 days actually. Huh. Not a major milestone sort of birthday, other than being one I couldn’t see reaching from the vantage point of my 20’s. I struggled to put items on a wishlist to make things easy on my Traveling Partner. There’s not much that I want in life that I don’t have, and my needs are fairly simple. (There are plenty of ludicrous extravagences that I don’t have, but few of those hold even passing appeal.)

…62 doesn’t “feel old”, and doesn’t necessarily feel like a moment worth a notable celebration…

I walked the local trail this morning, grateful to be walking. It’s a gray rainy Pacific Northwest Spring morning. My ears are ringing, my tinnitus is bad enough to be a distraction this morning. My back aches with arthritis pain, but my legs aren’t so sore and I definitely feel an improvement in freedom of movement since starting on the elliptical machine every day at home. (Hell of a good find at an affordable price, and I’m grateful for the timing that brought my Traveling Partner’s eyes to that ad for a used elliptical machine!) Incremental change, one step at a time. Due to pain, my walking pace rarely gets my heart rate up, and the elliptical machine has already proven its worth for cardio benefits.

The meadow grasses and weeds are lush and green along the edge of the vineyard. The hills on the horizon are shades of blue gray, with white patches near the tops that are either snow or clouds clinging to the hillsides. It’s barely raining at all, not even a drizzle just occasional fine misty droplets I see on my glasses but don’t feel on my face. I breathe, exhale, and relax. Long Memorial Day weekend ahead. I sigh contentedly. This is a nice moment right here. I make a point of enjoying it.

I think about my birthday again, doing a mental inventory of things I like and enjoy generally that I might want more of… I chuckle to myself. I have what I need and it’s enough. Fucking hell that’s got to make gift giving a bit complicated for the giver! Fortunately, I’m also pretty easy to please, delighted by the thought of being held in sufficiently high regard to be the recipient of a gift in the first place.

A small brown bird is scuffling through the bits of leaf matter and the weeds near my feet, unconcerned with my presence. The raindrops on my face are more obvious now. I sigh again, aware that the clock is ticking (metaphorically) and get to my feet to head back to the car; it’s time to begin again.

I’m sipping a cup of tea after my morning walk.

My legs ache fiercely, mostly because we purchased a used elliptical machine to improve our fitness strategy (at home), and I’ve been using it. I can “go further, faster” on the elliptical than I can on the trail, with less strain and more emphasis on cardio. I’m hoping this gets me past being a bit “stuck”, and hoping it is a helpful addition for my Traveling Partner, too. Being “stuck” needed attention, and this feels like a win – if we reliably use it. My short-term goal is to add at least 1 mile on the elliptical each day to my routine, and increase that over the next few weeks until I’m managing an additional 5 miles per day on the machine (on top of my trail miles, which tend to be slower).

I’m sipping my tea and thinking about a job opportunity that has developed, with a former colleague I have always greatly enjoyed working with. Here’s the thing, though, unlike the fitness challenge that I was struggling with and needed a solution for, I am enjoying the job I have right now, and wasn’t looking for a change. Weighing the value of the opportunity against my current contentment feels a lot different than “solving a problem”. It’s okay to let an opportunity pass by if the timing and circumstances aren’t “right” for it. I think it over, and sip my tea. What do I want? What does my life need? What takes me further down the path of becoming the woman I most want to be as a human being? These are important questions to answer, before I make a change I don’t really need to make.

…Nice problem to have…

I sigh and stretch. Breathe, exhale, relax. Sip my tea feeling satisfied with the moment and wrapped in love. It’s an ordinary work day, doing a job I enjoy with a team I appreciate and hold in high regard. I’m working from home in a space that feels comfortable and supports my needs. I pull my posture more upright, adjust the position of my keyboard. I notice the pain in my legs (just sore muscles) and in my back (osteo arthritis), but my headache is minimal (a nice change) and my tinnitus is present but not a major distraction this morning (I’m grateful). It’s an ordinary enough day, all things considered. The clock ticks on, questions to ask, questions to answer, moments to live and things to decide – all very ordinary indeed. It’s already time to begin again.

It’s a gray rainy Monday morning, just at daybreak. I’m sipping my iced coffee and working on catching up on things in order to begin the week. Looking over reminders, and setting new reminders for other things. Checking my “day plan” for work and my “to-do list” for things at home. Reflecting on the delightful weekend, surprisingly intimate and connected, spent in the good company of my Traveling Partner. Good food. Memorable moments. A feeling of warmth, affection, and emotional safety. Some things got done, but nothing at the expense of feeling good together, which was clearly the most important thing. I sit smiling, feeling merry, joyful, and loved.

…I don’t need to change a thing about this moment, at all, just relax and enjoy it, which is a lovely feeling…

I am deeply grateful for moments like these, sitting between moments of life and work, simply enjoying this delightful sliver of being, and “now”. I’m also grateful that I know to take my time with such moments, and really wring every bit of joy from them that they provide, savoring the moment, and the feelings. These are truly moments worthy of making room (and time) for. I breathe, exhale, and relax. On to the next moment, soon enough, there’s no hurry.

…This too will pass, at some point, and it will be time to begin again – but for now? It’s just me, this cup of coffee, and this lovely moment. I think I’ll stay awhile. 😀

I’m enjoying a few quiet minutes while goulash cooks-down in the dutch oven. I didn’t write this morning, but honestly didn’t have much to say. The moment was its own thing, and I was enjoying it entirely as it was, and my contentment became the content of my day, which I spent mostly on housekeeping and hanging out with my Traveling Partner. It was a day well-spent, and worthy of some sort of comfortable, hearty, and nourishing evening repast. 😀

I can hear the conversation of my Traveling Partner and the Anxious Adventurer in the other room. They are beginning a game of cribbage. I can’t actually hear the details of the words shared between them, I only hear the merry hum of their conversation mixed with the music playing in the background. What a lovely evening!

If I had sat down to write “how to have a pleasant day”, I’m not sure I could have guided anyone else through this experience sufficiently well for them to share it, or craft such a thing on their own. I have a satisfying sort of “got this one right” feeling, and I’m doing my best to avoid over-thinking things or reading any kind of tempting steady-state of being into one day. It is, however, quite a nice day as days go, and I sit with that for a moment, really savoring it, thinking over what got done without being smug about it, thinking about what got fucked-off for some other day without beating myself up over it, just enjoying the day precisely as it is, and has been. It’ll be ideal to finish the day in good company, over a tasty meal, and I smile to myself. I know I have come far enough that if I were to “ruin dinner” somehow, it wouldn’t be anything more than a moment of aggravation, and pivot to “plan B”, moving on to continuing to enjoy the day, without a tantrum or freak out over something as small as dinner.

…The fragance of the smoked paprika, garlic, and onions fills the house slowly…

What a nice weekend. I sit with that awhile, too. I don’t have any solutions, but I do know it is helpful to give more attention to our pleasant moments and small joys that we often tend to do. Savor your best moments – they’ll pass. Don’t give up on them prematurely. Give less thought to your most difficult moments – they’ll pass. Let them.

It’s unhealthy to let Other People’s Drama (however near or far away) live rent free in our heads. Let small shit stay small. Let things so far outside your control that you are literally helpless to change them (or uable even to be an actual bystander), let that shit just not even be part of your moment-to-moment awareness for a time. The world with be what it is, regardless, and the most useful we can do – often – is simply to be our best selves, living our best lives, in the most kind, enouraging, and practical way possible. Understanding that others around us may be having a very different experience. Perspective and sufficiency can make so much difference to an experience! I breathe, exhale, and relax. “Feels like things are looking up,” is a lovely way to feel – but it is “only a feeling”. Emotion. It is its own thing. Enjoy or endure emotions, as they are, and be kind to yourself and the people are around you. It’s a very human journey. (And I’m not telling you what to do – your choices and actions and will are your own. Do you. I’m just sharing things that I’ve learned or have been helpful for me, personally. Do with that what you will. I just think these are better practices than some alternatives.)

The music in the background stops. The playlist has ended. The ventilation comes on, and the scents from the kitchen are carried further. Smells good. I glance at the time; the clock is always ticking. I remember the package the Anxious Adventurer brought to me earlier – forgotten, left where I suggested he put it. I haven’t even opened it yet, and don’t recall what it may be. lol What a lovely evening – and it’s time to begin again, anyway.