The prompt on this blank page suggests I share 5 of my favorite things. Thanks, I’ll pass. lol I mean, I could, but haven’t I got a mind of my own? Thoughts of my own? A direction of my own to take this “conversation”? I’ve got my ubiquitous cup of coffee beside me – a treat, in this case, an eggnog latte. 😀 (These ridiculous things have has many calories as an entire meal, so I don’t have them often, in spite of the holiday seasonality creating false scarcity that tends to suggest to me I should have them as often as I can. lol There’s something to learn from this…)

It’s very early. I woke ahead of my alarm, but I don’t know what woke me. Whatever it was likely also woke my Traveling Partner. As I dressed quietly in another room, he got up and came to see what I was doing (…um… getting dressed to make an early, quiet, departure as we’d discussed the night before…?). He went back to bed, curiosity satisfied. (And shortly after I had departed, sent me emoji kisses and let me know he was awake, after all. So much for him being able to sleep in!) I quietly got my things together for a new work day (and week) and headed to the co-work space I frequent, and here I now am; set up and ready to begin the work day after I’ve had my coffee and done some writing. 😀

I don’t really feel much like writing on a theme this morning. Nothing much to troubleshoot of my day-to-day experience. I remind myself to make a follow-up appointment with my G.P. now that my lab results are back. I think ahead to dinner, and take a moment to regret with some amusement that I forgot to bring my lunch today – and Tuesdays are mostly meetings through the midday – hard to walk away at “lunch time”! My mind wanders through thoughts and ideas the way my fingers dance across the keyboard. I’m not yet entirely awake, I suspect. Still working on this first luscious cup of coffee, excessively creamy and smooth compared to the clean bite of a properly made Americano or pour-over served black. The morning feels vaguely celebratory. It was a lovely long weekend, and in general I’ve got what I need in life and then some. I’m honestly still not entirely used to that. There are moments when I find myself “waiting for the other shoe to drop” in a most peculiar way that likely isn’t at all healthy – just very human.

I think about a recent email from a friend (responding to an email I sent over Thanksgiving). I feel fortunate to have so many very good friends. I’ve got a fair few long-standing friendships of many years endurance that I cherish. There are others that are perhaps somewhat less close as the years pass, and I’m delighted when such friends also allow the years to melt away when we again connect. It’s nice. I enjoy my friends. We don’t spend much time together in each others actual company these days; life has blown us hither and thither and the big get-togethers that once characterized some of these associations have either slowly discontinued over time – or I’ve simply gotten too far away to easily attend, myself. Funny where life takes us. I still think fondly of those gatherings and the many friends I’ve made over the years (although I am admittedly really pretty bad at staying in touch). I add an item to my to-do list, “email friends”, and another “do some snail mail”. I enjoy making hand-made cards and writing letters in ink.

The office music this morning is holiday music. A rather glum version of “God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen” tinkles away in the background, strangely grim and suggestive of spooky doings in the night far more than gifts under the tree. LOL

Yesterday, unexpectedly, I found myself feeling rather blue and specifically about the holidays. So many family members gone now. Friends, too. Moments that could once be shared with joy are now nostalgic touch-points, poignant and wistful and sometimes hard to bring up. I am disconnected from most of “my generation” of family, far flung lives that don’t intersect mine anymore that continue somewhere… “out there”. I wonder who my cousins have grown to become? Where life has taken them? Most of the familial sources of early-life trauma (in my life) have died. We are mortal creatures. I was surprised to note, when I did, that their passing did not immediately ease the lasting damage done. I remember being supremely annoyed by that at the time. It’s less interesting as observations go, where I stand today. Doesn’t stop me from wishing I could show them how far I have come in spite of them. I’m not sure that’s really a healthy thing, though, and I guess I’m okay with letting that go. (What choice do I have? It’s tough to schedule a meeting with the dead. LOL)

…What a lovely quiet morning…

…Good coffee…

I pause writing for a few minutes to read the news. It’s the usual dreck. I set it aside and sip my coffee; it’s starting to cool down and this particular coffee beverage is fairly off-putting once it is no longer hot. I’m not inclined to rush it along, just making a point to savor it at its best. 🙂

It’s not really time to start work, yet. I mean… I could, but I am not expected to do so at this early hour. The morning is a mild one, although chilly, and I decide to get a walk in along our “main street”, a good opportunity to enjoy the holiday lights without dealing with crowded sidewalks. 😀 A nice way to begin the day, too…