Archives for posts with tag: enlightenment

I woke from a strange dream to the light of my morning alarm. In my dream, I was standing in the morning sunshine in front of a favorite cafe from many years ago and very far from where I live now (I didn’t notice that, it was a dream after all). A sport car pulled up next to me, convertible top down, and it was full of old friends. “We’re seeking enlightenment,” someone called to me, “get in!”

I stepped towards the car and as I did, it became a bus, and I stepped on board. The door snapped closed and I realized I hadn’t had time to get my coffee… and I woke.

[No AI is used in writing or editing this blog. This is human content for human readers.]

…Seeking enlightenment…

Enlightenment isn’t likely to be found on a road trip with ones friends… but it could be, maybe. That’s the thing, isn’t it? One can endlessly seek enlightenment and never ever find it; it isn’t an external point on a map, or available as a option on a luxury getaway. People who say they’ve found it, generally haven’t. It’s not available as a course, although it’s often packaged and sold as though it could be purchased. Read all the books – it may not be enough. Follow any holy seeming teacher – it may not result in the knowledge you think you’re seeking. As with happiness, it doesn’t do to chase enlightenment, because that just isn’t the way to achieve it.

… I didn’t say (and don’t claim) that I know the way, nor that I have become enlightened. I’m not here for that. I’m just thinking about a strange dream.

As I walk down the trail this morning, I think about the friends I saw on the “bus to enlightenment” in my dream. No one from my childhood at all. A couple of soldiers who deployed with me during the war, seated in the back of the bus, neither of whom exist in this mortal life now. Up front, dear friends from my Fresno days, and a friend or two I made later on, in other places. The thing they all shared in common was that I consider them all to have been very close and dear friends, but it’s been many years since I’ve been in touch at all. I think about that as I walk. History. Proximity. Perspective. I keep walking.

Morning light

… I may never find enlightenment, but I’ve enjoyed the company of some extraordinary travelers along the way…

I feel fortunate to have enjoyed so many good friendships, and occasional moments of epiphany that felt very much as though I had been “illuminated from within”, however briefly. It has been enough. More than enough, I’ve been very fortunate.

I watch the sunrise illuminate the oaks. I sit at my halfway point on my walk, and perhaps in life (if I’m lucky), reflecting on enlightenment, and wondering how many of the travelers on the “bus to enlightenment” are now deceased? At least two, maybe more, I haven’t stayed in touch, and it’s possible I would not have been told. A grim shiver runs up my spine. I’m glad I woke. I’m not ready to ride that bus. Not yet.

I breathe, exhale, and relax, and remind myself to reach out to old friends while I can. The clock is ticking. I look down the trail. It curves away into an unknown moment ahead, just around that bend… and it’s time to begin again.

Yesterday was a beautiful and fulfilling excursion into a single prolonged moment of self-reflection and wonder. Meaning to say, it was a lovely day spent mostly in my own head.

What enlightenment looks like.

I walked miles of beach at low tide, close to the water’s edge where the sand is most firm and walkable. I ventured across slipping loose sand to explore rocks piled at the foot of steep erosion prone cliffs. I peered into tide pools ankle deep in waves as the tide turned. I walked,  and wondered as I wandered.

I saw empty limpet and crab shells on the beach, and pebbles tumbled smooth by ocean waves. I saw anemones and starfish clinging to the rocks exposed at low tide. I saw a variety of sea plants uprooted and tossed along the beach, and even corals torn from wherever they had been, and carried to the chilly Oregon beach on which I spent the morning. Name it? Nah. Go find your own. lol The adventure and satisfaction are not about the specific location, they are more to do with how I spent the time and where I turned my attention; inward.

What you see is often a matter of where you look. This is a picture of a starfish.

I enjoyed the day. I feel more rested than I have in a long while. I sit now, alongside the local trail I’ve been walking most mornings lately, enjoying a few minutes of quiet reflection as the sun rises. Today is an ordinary work day. I feel easy in my skin and comfortable with myself. I’m in a ferocious amount of pain, which is neither surprising nor particularly consequential. It’s just a “feature” of this mortal life.

I breathe, exhale, and relax. This morning, the world’s stress and chaos, the violence, the bullshit, and the jockeying for power by the already powerful is nothing to do with me, directly. I’m here, now, in this moment, in this local place. My heart feels light. It’s enough.

I look down the trail, as the eastern horizon turns a bold orange. A new day begins. I smile and get to my feet. It’s time for me to begin, again, too.