Archives for posts with tag: perspective

With a Purpose In Mind

March 23, 2025 //

Yesterday afternoon the sun came out. I got out into the garden to check on seedlings and pull some weeds. I’d purchased a couple of French tarragon plants to replace those that died during the winter (they don’t care for the cold). I planned to get those planted.

On my morning walk I had continued to consider solutions to “the deer problem”. I enjoy seeing them in the yard, and don’t at all mind them passing through, but I’d definitely like to prevent them from eating my roses! After much thought I’ve decided to plant lavender here and there, hoping it discourages the deer. I planted seeds in starters and my waiting began, but… Lavender is slow to sprout and some of the apparently more temptingly tasty roses (to the deer) need their fragrant companions sooner.

The afternoon sunshine tempted me to make the trip to the local nursery, and I was delighted to find several pleasing varieties of lavender, well-rooted, in 4″ pots. With a careful eye on my budget, I picked out a nice assortment and headed back to the garden.

I planted the tarragon, and the lavender. I positioned it so that deer approaching a tasty rose would necessarily happen upon the lavender first, and hopefully find that not to their liking. I guess I’ll find out soon. lol I spent time enjoying the new plantings and meandering around the garden for awhile, pulling weeds. It’s not enough to have a garden. There’s work to be done to produce a harvest, and to make it a beautiful welcoming space. Even the most informal cottage garden benefits greatly from a bit of planning and care. I thought about flowers, and herbs. I considered extending the primroses down all along the walkway between the driveway and front door; they do very well here. I thought about dahlias and chives, and wondered whether I can fit another rose in somewhere. I smiled as I worked, feeling satisfied and uplifted.

I keep a map of my garden and make notes about the plan, and the results.

This morning, my thoughts are still in the garden as I wait for the sun. Later in the Spring as it heads towards summer, there will be lupines here on the sunny hillside above the marsh trail. I have a few in my garden, grown from seeds. They take awhile to get going, but so beautiful once they do!

I sit with my thoughts and my coffee. My garden is a haven from the cares of the world, and it is a metaphor for what it takes to live well, and reminder of the value in making the effort. So many verbs involved! So much effort and planning and thoughtful attention required! Totally worth it.

Daybreak arrives. Dawn follows. It’s a gray misty morning, and today the park is almost crowded (or so it seems; I’m not alone). I lace up my boots and prepare to walk my own path. It’s time to begin again. Later? I’ll be in the garden.

Tags be here now, be present, breathe, do the work, gardening, growing my own, herbs, how does your garden grow?, how to live in the moment, joy, lavender, meditation garden, memory garden, natural pest control, organic, perspective, reap what you sow, roses, self-care, self-reflection, sufficiency, sustainable, tending the garden, the garden of paradise, weeding the garden, what are you planting?

Categories Allegories, breathe, Free Will, gardening, gratitude, Healthy Living, inspiration, joy, meditation, Metaphors, Mindfulness, Moments, Perspective, Practices, Roses, Spring, The Art of Being

Well, Of Course

March 22, 2025 //

This morning I woke to an ordinary Saturday, with ordinary plans: an ordinary walk on a familiar trail, a typical Saturday routine of grocery shopping and some housekeeping tasks. Of course, it’s only entirely predictable (and somewhat amusing) that today there’s no rain. I smile to myself at the utter predicability of such circumstances. Plans are only plans, and the weather doesn’t take my plans into account, it just happens.

Yesterday rained. It rained hard. It rained persistently. It rained sideways. The wind blew the rain under the cover of the gazebo where I had hoped to paint with a ferocity that ensured I couldn’t. I can only laugh about it. I got some great hiking in (in the rain), and pleasant time spent with my thoughts (listening to the rain fall). It was a good day. I went home early, and painted some there. It was less of what I had in mind, but it was plenty of what I needed.

Sometimes “enough” has to be… enough.

The cumulative effect of days hiking new trails, eager and energetic, unconcerned about the terrain, finds me aching all over this morning. My ankles ache. My back aches. My head aches. I’m stiff and my muscles are sore. I’m not really complaining, just noticing how I feel, physically. It’ll pass, mostly, and the exertion and varied movement is healthy. (Besides, I’ve been having a great time, and this pain is a small price to pay.) I managed to actually sleep in this morning, waking almost two hours later than I ordinarily might. I woke feeling rested, calm, and content.

I sit sipping my coffee and watching daybreak become the dawn of a new day. I’ll walk this familiar trail, then return home, hitting up the grocery store on my way. Housekeeping today, definitely, but maybe I’ll also paint? The future isn’t written, and this is a very good time to begin again.

Every journey begins where you are. It’s a good place to start.

Tags a mile in my shoes, art and the artist, be here now, be present, begin again, do the verbs, don't stand still, how mindfulness works, inclement weather, let it rain, live live live!, living the life, perspective, reality doesn't care what you believe, results may vary, self-care, solitude, solo hiking, tell someone where you'll be, the map is not the world, walk on, walking my own mile, we become what we practice, weather, what matters most?

Categories Allegories, art and the artist, breathe, Free Will, Frustration, gratitude, health, Healthy Living, inspiration, joy, meditation, Metaphors, Mindfulness, Moments, Oregon Trails, pain, Perspective, Practices, solo hiking, Spring, The Art of Being, Uncategorized

The Stress Is Real

March 17, 2025 //

Whether or not whatever is causing our stress and anxiety is “real” – the stress itself, the actual anxiety is real. Strange how that works.

I sneeze suddenly and dart across the room to the corner where I’ve tucked my handbag, and scramble frantically through the contents looking for the travel pack of tissues I know is there somewhere. Damn it! Another sneeze, and now my nose is running like crazy and I dread finding myself covered in snot. I continue scrambling through the contents of my handbag a bit panicked, finally finding the tissues after I basically dump the contents onto the top of the printer in the corner. I return to my desk, feeling relieved, then my eye falls on an actual box of tissues right there on my damned desk, unnoticed, placed there by the cleaning crew over the weekend. I sigh, amused and frustrated, and astonished at the intensity of my absolutely pointless moment of stress. The stress was real. The cause of it wasn’t real at all; it was based on a misperception, a misunderstanding, an error in thinking.

“Anxiety” 10″ x 14″ – and she feels much bigger than that, generally.

…That’s often how stress and anxiety work; we respond to something in our thoughts or perceived experience without regard to the actual factual basis of the circumstances, and the stress builds so quickly we fail to “fact check” what’s going on around us…

I take a moment to let renewed calm sink in. I breathe, exhale, and relax. It’s a new moment. I begin again.

My Traveling Partner had asked me (some time ago) to help with some paperwork. I have been dreading doing it, not because it’s actually all that big a deal, but because… stress. My own medical trauma and difficulties with some sorts of paperwork has been getting in the way of helping him out. He’s got his own challenges and anxiety to do with it, but it’s mostly been about the practical difficulties with keyboarding for long enough to get it done. He needs my help. I am happy to provide it – in the abstract – but the reality of the stress it has been causing me flared up yesterday afternoon, and I found myself in a moment of headache and pain and stressful tears over… mostly nothing. It’s just not that big a deal. It collided with my awareness of the upcoming busy Tuesday calendar (he has a couple of appointments to get to, and needs help getting to those) and my upcoming time off (which appears now to need to include Tuesday) and my headache, and I just… couldn’t get my head around all of it calmly. I found myself facing a huge feeling of pressure and imminent requirement to get it all done. Funny – not one detail of any of it is all that big a deal, so… why all the stress and agita? Why the anxiety? What the actual fuck, eh?

Humans being human. This morning it doesn’t look like all that big a deal. I look over the provided checklist for the paperwork, it’s not all that bothersome, actually. The appointments tomorrow? The Anxious Adventurer stepped up, agreeing to take his father to those appointments. I took it in stride this morning when it turned out I also have an appointment, scheduled in between my Traveling Partner’s appointments, and which would have prevented me from taking him to both of his, regardless. Busy day. The paperwork? It’s just paperwork. Needs to be done so it can join a queue of other paperwork submitted by other human beings to be considered by still other human beings at some considerably later date. Just not that big a deal, I guess. But the stress was real. That’s an important detail; managing that stress was its own thing, with its own needs and its own steps. A real concern, for a real human being – and I’m grateful that my Traveling Partner recognized the need ahead of my own acknowledgement of my stress (which was escalating and confounding my ability to reason), and helped me address it, enabling me to more easily self-soothe, and get myself back on track. No tantrum, no meltdown. The headache lingered through the evening, but even that wasn’t that big a deal once the stress had been managed. Stress complicates everything by clouding our comprehension and judgment, making everything look like a bigger deal than it may actually be.

This morning, I breathe, exhale, and relax. I slept well and deeply last night – I clearly needed the rest. I feel like my body (and mind) have finally made the adjustment to the change to the clocks (good grief I wish we’d stop doing that). I feel more settled and comfortable in my skin. Okay for most values of “okay”, and ready for a new day (and week). The Equinox is coming, and so is my time off. It’ll be nice to have a few relaxed days painting, drinking coffee, driving beautiful roads to lovely destinations, and doing some painting. It is time planned to be very low stress. I hope it actually turns out that way, although the future is not written, and I have no way to know what obstacles may be on the path ahead. lol It’s a very human experience.

I’d like to spend a little time in the garden, too. So much of my experience in life is based on what I’ve planted, what I tend to. I think awhile about my garden as a metaphor… there are weeds to pull, seedlings to nurture, and a harvest in the future. For now? It’s time to begin, again.

My garden is a special place for me – and a useful metaphor.

Tags anxiety, anxiety is a liar, appointment calendar, be here now, begin again, breathe exhale relax, busy, emotional self sufficiency, Gardening as a metaphor, health, it's a metaphor, mental-health, mindfulness, perspective, practicing the practices, ptsd, reality check, stress, stress is real, stress management, taking care of me, TBI, tending the garden of my heart, The Art of Being, there are verbs involved, time management

Categories Allegories, Anxiety, Brain Injury, breathe, Free Will, Frustration, gratitude, health, Healthy Living, Logic & Reason, meditation, Metaphors, Mindfulness, Moments, Perspective, Post Traumatic Stress, Practices, Relationships, Spring, The Art of Being

Are We There Yet?

March 14, 2025 //

I’m sipping my coffee and thinking about Spring. This is not one of those rare years when I could afford to be careless or casual about resources as Spring approached. My thoughts are in the garden, but I can’t be eager or easy-going about spending money on the garden. I have plenty of seeds – do I have the patience to wait for seedlings to sprout? The new raised bed I want? That comes at a cost (in money and labor). The time is, perhaps, not now. I’m planning with more care, with an eye on the near and long-term future. I’m making a plan. The clock is ticking. Other things are, maybe, more important. What matters most? I sit with my thoughts and my coffee, gazing out into the early morning sky through the office window.

Thinking, planning, daydreaming – the future is a playground, but it isn’t real, yet. The future is all possibilities, opportunities, and choices. We can make it what we want it to be – with some effort, and some careful decision-making, and some luck. There are verbs involved. Chance and change will call some of the shots. The path is not reliably clear, or reliably smooth. We make our own way, each having our own experience, each having to clear the hurdles of unanticipated circumstances, and the consequences of our actions. I’d like to be in the garden right now. I could walk away from work and go do that, but… consequences. I sip my coffee, breathe, exhale, and relax.

When did *chicken* become almost $10 per pound?!

I’m in considerable pain this morning (it’s just my arthritis, and there’s nothing much to be done about it besides endure with some measure of grace). I’m thinking about that distant future… if I hold out and don’t retire before I’m 70, and keep this job, my social security retirement will pay about half what I make, working. That’s livable, especially with my VA disability compensation, my Traveling Partner’s income (whatever it may be then), and the potential for having paid off the mortgage (a goal) and keeping other bills low (another goal). So many choices and verbs – so much potential, so little certainty.

What is blooming in your garden? What have you planted?

I sigh to myself and look out at the sky, thinking about the primroses blooming in the garden. It’s a rainy morning. There are probably raindrops clinging to the petals. Maybe the deer have come to the garden to look around for a tasty rose to nibble on? The roses are doing well this year, so far. I smile at the thought – it doesn’t take much to make me “happy”, for most values of happiness, now that I understand better what it is I need from life to thrive and be well. I’ve learned to rely on building lasting contentment and savoring small joys to get me through difficult times – because those things are easily within reach, can be practiced, and are enough. I’ve learned to avoid “chasing happiness” – it’s a trap. Happiness will find me when it finds me, and most often when I’m not looking for it. That’s enough.

I sip my coffee, and think my thoughts. Lavender to keep the deer away from the roses, maybe? Scented Geraniums to discourage insects? My Traveling Partner confirmed with me that he would be okay with that (allergies can make a person’s life a living hell, so I check in with him about flowers and such). I’m eager to do something about that. The ideas tickle my imagination and distract me. I’m grateful that it is Friday. I’m eager to finish the work day and begin again on other things, and to walk a path in Spring time. There’s a garden to tend and a future harvest to plant. (Yes, it’s a metaphor.)

Tags begin again, do better, emotional self sufficiency, life, Living Well, meditation, mental-health, mindfulness, perspective, practicing the practices, read a book, results may vary, taking care of me, tend your garden with care, The Art of Being, the happiness trap, there are verbs involved, Vita Contemplativa, what are you doing about it?, what are you practicing?, what matters most?, you harvest what you plant, you reap what you sow

Categories Allegories, breathe, Free Will, gardening, gratitude, Healthy Living, inspiration, joy, meditation, Metaphors, Mindfulness, Moments, pain, Perspective, Practices, Roses, Spring, The Art of Being

An Apple A Day

March 13, 2025 //

I’m sipping my coffee and doing specific work that requires an occasional “proper break” to step away and give my mind a rest. It exposes me to some poor behavior human beings are sometimes prone to: dishonesty, entitlement, poor character, scams, frauds, and general terrible behavior. I sigh quietly and stare out into the sky, mostly blue, hints of the gray clouds that covered the sky earlier as they shred and drift away. Good and bad, this is a very human experience.

I remind myself that “one bad apple” may “spoil the barrel”, but it doesn’t ruin the entire harvest. Just saying – don’t let a single bad apple discourage you from enjoying the fruits of the tree. There’s more to humanity than any one bad actor. There’s more to people than the terrible behavior of some few. The bad character of one individual is not the measure of a population, or a culture. Shitty human beings doing terrible things are by far the rarity, and like “one bad apple” in a barrel, closely connected to other apples by proximity or association, rot may spread – but out in the open, among many, in the light of day? That rot doesn’t spread so far or so fast. One bad apple from a single tree in a vast orchard hardly counts for much. Move on and taste sweeter fruit!

I smile to myself. I’m enjoying the metaphor. It’s nearly Spring. There is blue sky overhead and gardening to do (metaphorically, and in practical terms). I enjoy my coffee, and my break, before I begin again. Terrible human beings and those merely “of poor character” are not worth taking personally, but it’s ideal to avoid them, whenever possible. I think about the world, about my place in it, and about “being the change” – and being the best version of myself I know how to be. I can do better than yesterday, today, and better still tomorrow. I’ll just keep beginning again.

Each step along this path has been worthy in it’s own distinct way, although I don’t always see it at the time I take the step.

The journey is the destination. I’ll stay on my path.

Tags bad character, be the change, begin again, do better, do your best, ethical behavior, fraudsters, humans being human, meditation, metaphors, mindfulness, one bad apple, perspective, practicing the practices, rotten fruit, scammers, stay on the path, The Art of Being, the four agreements, there are verbs involved, we become what we practice, what are you practicing?, what matters most?

Categories Allegories, breathe, Free Will, gardening, Logic & Reason, meditation, Metaphors, Moments, Perspective, Practices, Spring, The Art of Being

With a Purpose In Mind

Share this:

Well, Of Course

Share this:

The Stress Is Real

Share this:

Are We There Yet?

Share this:

An Apple A Day

Share this:

Archives