I’m sitting by the trail on a cool morning that is forecasted to become quite a hot day. I’m tired and sleepy, and probably could have slept later. This morning’s hike has felt more than usually difficult. A yawn splits my face. I stretch, wishing there were somewhere convenient to stretch out for a few minutes to close my eyes and rest.

[No AI is used in writing or editing this blog. This is human content for human readers.]

My headache is bad this morning, and my tinnitus is loud. My muscles feel sore, although I’ve no idea why, and my major joints ache. I’m not complaining, I’m just taking inventory. Rough morning. As precious as these finite mortal moments are, I might choose to “skip ahead” to the next day, if that were an option.

I sit with my mostly empty thoughts, watching the sky lighten as sunrise begins.   The eastern horizon is covered in clouds, there is no actual sunrise to see. Facing west, I watch the sky go from vibrant pinks and peaches, to pale lemon yellow and then to a soft blue. It is sunrise enough. It’s a new day!

I feel the flames of my occipital neuralgia licking at the left side of my face. “So it’s gonna be like that, is it?” I think to myself, more than a little annoyed by all of this pain and discomfort. I breathe, exhale, and relax, and try to start my day well in spite of my discomfort. So far so… entirely average.

… I spend too much time bitching, perhaps, and too little time counting the wins, or if nothing else the steps in life that have continued to take me further and further from traumatic events now honestly so far in the past it feels a bit awkward to acknowledge they could still be a problem. The wins and the progress matter more… don’t they?

I think about steps on a path, for awhile. The journey is the destination – and I have come far. That’s worth celebrating, even when I hurt like this. Maybe especially then.

As the sky brightens, I begin to wake up more, which is a good thing; my work day is packed with meetings today. Ideally, I’ll be awake for those! 😆

I breathe the cool morning air deeply – then deal with the sneezing fit and runny nose that seem to be the result. I’m grateful for the pack of tissues I had hastily stuffed into my pocket when I got out of the car. I stretch uncomfortably. I sigh, exhaling the volume of air slowly. Another yawn, another stretch, another breath. Damn, I do not feel like being awake this morning.

One step at a time. One foot in front of the other. It is a progression. Some days are hard. Some days are easier. There’s always a next step. I look down the trail, thinking thoughts of paths as metaphors and considering whether to go camping this weekend and give my Traveling Partner a break. Should be good weather for it… where would I go?

I sigh to myself and look at the time. Almost time to begin again.